Long ago, when life began, our species survived by reacting instantly to the threats. The ancient humans who stopped to smell the roses became easy targets for predators. Today, the predators are mostly gone, but we are still so primed to pay attention to bad news and tend to ignore the good things happening around us. Sivadoss, my father belonged to this very category. He was a grumbler and kept complaining constantly about one thing or the other. He failed to count his blessings and would rather count his problems. He was blessed with five children, three sons and two daughters and I happen to be the eldest of them. Being his loving daughter, I would make an all out effort to solve all his problems, whatever it be. However, father would take the progress for granted and find a new cause for alarm. After his retirement, when he was finding it difficult to make both ends meet, he took a drastic decision in his life. He wanted the eldest of his three sons Sampathkumar to go abroad for a job and support him financially. When he divulged this fact to me, I set about the task in good earnest and wished to fulfill his desire. My brother on the other hand was a man of temper. First, he expressed his disinterest in leaving the family and second he was not willing to pay through his nose to the international recruiting agencies as bribes to get a job. With my prayers, I succeeded in changing his mind. Very soon, he also got a job offer in Jamaica. It was from an Indian, Narayanan, settled in Jamaica. He did not charge any recruitment fee and was also willing to pay for his air-tickets. On reaching Jamaica, my brother realized that he had been duped. He was not given the promised job. He had a tiff with his boss and left the company. Suddenly he finds himself on the streets, penniless. I was gripped with an acute feeling of guilt, for it was me, who had coaxed him to accept the job and leave the country. Shocked beyond belief at the plight my brother had landed himself, I now felt that it was my responsibility to bring him back to India. The letter was the only means of communication then and with less access to phones, it took me nine long years to achieve this goal.
Title: The Guilt Is Alive
Author: Hemalatha Gnanasekar
Pages: 196
My review
The Guilt is Alive is a testimony of siblings bond. More than a memoir, this is an exact reflection of a middle-class Indian family. Hemalatha who is the eldest of five children in the family is bound with responsibilities from her birth. Her parents had special care and love for her. But they all came with a price. The parents have high expectations and children are bound to fulfil them, even if it costs their life. This pushed her to interfere in the lives of her brother to meet their father’s wishes. But it does not turns out well and become a source of guilt for her even today. This memoir is heart touching revisit to those days.
Hemalatha’s story is an accurate portrayal of a family. Her memories brings many laughs and tears at times. She has carried this memoir without losing its emotional intensity from beginning to end.
The struggle for money is real. Every penny counts and it is essential for the survival. Besides all these chaos, only one emotion that unites them is love. We can feel the connection and love between the characters throughout the story. This emotional narration is the backbone of the story.
This memoir is a living acknowledgement of sibling relationship. Although the author still hasn’t forgiven herself for interfering to the decisions of her brother’s life, I found one superior connection in their story. No matter how hard is their circumstances, they both are capable to turn things around with their hard work. They quickly get out of the after-effects of every bad decisions through hard work. They never sacrificed their mutual love for them.
The whole book is edited accurately to comply with the US standards. The thorough editing by two different editors reflects in the story. This ensures a smooth flow and connects all the events in the memoir well.
In a nutshell, this is a very good memoir sliced out from the real-life.
The Ultimate Reviewer 